Flowers and Thorns

brain vs heart

no no this ain’t medical issue.

this is about heart, as in feelings, vs brain, as in being rational

you know it’s not easy for you to control your heart

its like you’re focing your brain to not feel anything, while it actually aches

you know that its stupid for you to be hurt because of something stupid,

and you force your mind to not being hurt because of it,

yet your heart still aches. its like the impulse is sent and received anyway.

i’m in a constant battle and i don’t know when will this end.

somehow i feel jealous with those people who do not have this kind of issue.

oh how carefree they are, and how miserable i am.

miserable yet happy.

i’m sorry

i really dont know what is wrong with me,

i feel so miserable right now.

everything you do seems wrong, it seems like you’re making me feel angry on purpose.

what is wrong with us?

why?

alah tak sama dah kelas arab tensionnyaa

sempat 2 kelas je :(

i wanna cry bodoh kan T.T

sedang bersabar

you can use it, but ask first. it’s not yours 

cook, and then clean

less than 6 hours after i cleaned the kitchen, everything is a mess, again.

is it hard to put everything at the right place back?

is it so hard to close the freaking bottles?

is it so hard to not leave everything berterabur?

haihh

not once not twice but so many timess sampai dah serabut dah. -.-“

now i miss living with my family. takde serabut macam ni, kut.

hopefully when i live with him someday insyaAllah, tak macam ni hihi

you’re so cute.

and i can’t stand it. T,T

Ya Allah why am i so weak? i feel like ive become a servant of my own feelings. this is not right. this is not how it works. im supposed to be strong. how are we supposed to proceed if i already fail this stage? why do i feel all of these nasty feelings. it aches so badly. i can’t control it. i know its stupid but i can’t stop it :( what am i doing? please go away im begging you please go away. this is stupid. it is unacceptable

no it is not okay. no i am not okay

i dont know why it hurts

but it does. and i can’t stand it.

take it away. take it away